From 0-67

Previously on "Yes, I'm Single"....we delved into the great world of online dating.

The night of that blog posting, I bit the bullet and created an online dating profile.  I actually hit "create profile" at 10:06pm (this becomes relevant in just a second I promise).  By the time 5pm hit the very next day (5 hours short of a 24 hour timeframe) I had....wait for it....if you're clever you've already figured it out....67 total contacts.  67???  Now, I personally think very highly of myself, but even I don't think that there are 67 single men out there who want to date me.  I'm not even sure I've met 67 interested men total in the 33 years I've walked this planet.  And, if by some random chance I'm wrong here, where the BLEEP have these 67 men been???

Okay, sorry about the rant.

I asked a great friend how to go about working through all of this randomness and he offered some fantastic advice.  I deleted a few right from the top based on his suggestions, but being the therapist and always interested in human behavior, I gave more than a few of them a good read-through.  Let's review some of the more amusing ones, shall we?  I promise to keep screen names and other identifying information just to myself.

Example #1 of 67 (no, we're not going through all 67)

Age: 29

Do you own a car? Prefer not to answer 

Wait, what?  You prefer not to answer whether or not you own a car?  That could be a problem.

Example #2
Age: 34
Blah blah blah lol blah blah lol blah blah blah blah lol blah lol....
Seriously? 8 lol's in 1 message?  Deleted.

Example #3 (My favorite)
Age: 42
"think i met u last night if so u are a cool chick"
Like Shaggy says, it wasn't me.

And last but certainly not least Example #4
Age: 37
"if i were to date you nobody has to know"
Just keep it on the down looowwwwww....nobody has to know.....


Ok - so we've learned a few things from the mass quantity of contacts - 1, sometimes you gotta wade through a lot of frogs and 2, I seriously have issues with spelling and grammar.

I'm not giving up though - there was at least one of the 67 that may warrant a response.  Fingers crossed!

To Be Continued...

My Foray into the World of Online Dating

First, I apologize for the mini-blogcation.  Apparently it's been so long since I posted that I actually forgot the password to log in.  And then Google almost made me promise my first-born just to get a new password.  But here I am (take that Google)!

Now, on to the fun!

I recently decided that some changes may need to be made to my dating life.  In other words, there are re-runs on the History channel that are more interesting than dates I've been on.  So....I started thinking creatively about online dating.  I was always the one who stayed away from this form of meeting men, but since there's only so much Pawn Stars a person can watch in a month, I figured I'd give it a whirl.

I was in a conversation with a friend who routinely uses dating sites and he was explaining to me the pros and cons of this brand new world.  Blog disclaimer:  I am neither endorsing nor am I criticizing any of the dating sites I may accidentally mention from this point forward.  I just need to put that out there - the last thing I need is to get blackballed from online dating.  That would just be bad.

Anywho, we were talking about one well-known site and he shares that you have to answer a series of questions chosen by the potential match before any information is shared.  My first thought was - "that's a lot of work."  My second thought was - "and you wonder why you're single."  Ok, bring on the questions.  The good news here is that there are actually standardized answers that won't make you sound like a nutjob.  Positive points for that.

Everything was going fine until he proceeds to show me MULTIPLE pictures from profiles.  Uh oh, this could be a problem.  I'm the girl who instinctively hides when a camera comes out, like some alarm starts blaring DANGER DANGER and I duck for cover.  I've always been like that - I hate pictures. I hate pictures more than I hate creamed spinach.  And I seriously hate that.  He explains to me that while you always look at the best pictures, you really need to focus on the worst ones.  It's at this point where I start wondering how many profile pictures can include my cat before potential matches begin to think I'm crazy.

Anyone have an answer for that?  Anyone?

Okay then....multiple pictures where I don't look like I'm the old cat lady.  Hmmm....I wonder if Glamour Shots is still in business....

Never mind - I think I'll just continue to watch Pawn Stars and hope that Mr. Right comes randomly knocking on the door.